Setting up Goals is a great, if not the only, way to keep motivated. However, It's hard to stay motivated once you've hit a plateau, taken a hiatus, attained the goal or a combination of all mentioned. I'm back on the "restarting" phase of trying to keep motivated. Just as I was last time when I visited back home and stayed for a month or so, I'm back at home (my parent's house) trying to find purpose or motivation. The only thing different is the unbearable hot weather and the factor it plays on my unresponsive, unmotivated, and unproductive demeanor. I'm sort of on a lull with my work. I'm waiting for this massive pile of work from my client and I'm waiting for more info on another smaller paying project. In the meantime, I have pro bono projects I could be doing (and I should be doing) but have no motivation to do so. I've been trying to get inspired, which proves to be difficult. I have read a few more articles this week (involving workspace, art & design, and designers) than I have in recent months. That might sound accomplished, but reading 5 articles vs zilch isn't a big stretch. I've gotten lazy, but I saw it coming. No need to get stressed, frustrated, and upset about it. I have anticipated this moment, but it's always a b*tch to get things restarted/started/going.
Brief Timeline of Past Events
Late April/Early May I arrived at my parent's house to figure things out. I was going through another round of a quarter-life crisis. I hated feeling trapped in my apartment, working and living space intertwined. I was seeking new opportunities, in which there were a couple. I met with a company near my hometown and had ongoing projects with a company/client. I was (and still am) freaked out about turning 30 this year and haunted by the fact that I'm still single. All that came to pass as I got going. I started to write as a way to vent. I finally got a workout routine going. I bought a punching bag, jumped rope, and did my usual 4 mile run. I got myself in decent physical and mental shape during my time here. I had to travel back to my apartment for an upcoming bachelors weekend party, followed by a wedding two weeks after that. When arriving back at the apartment, I had my trials and error of feeling trapped, cramped, and frustrated. I was able to let go of my frustrations and felt free again. I was eating healthy, working out regularly, and enjoyed a weekend outside of California. Had dinner with the married couple to be along with 3 other pairs of "friends of a friend". I was the only single guy, but that didn't bother me. The week after that, I had a nice long stay in San Francisco. My days were always planned with things to do. I had one day of sight seeing, the other days were filled with errands we had to do for the wedding. We also met up with the married couple to be for lunch and dinner a few times during the week. Once the wedding happened and everything unfolded and dissipated... I think that's when reality set in. It's like those snow globes. You're inside living in it and someone shakes it violently. You're lost in the chaos, just waiting for the snow to settle. I had no motivation, no purpose, no goals to attain. Yes, I have bigger goals I would like to achieve, but they're accomplished by setting smaller goals in residing order. That's where I've been stuck. Not having the motivation to figure things out, to create smaller goals, or to look at the big picture. I've been letting the dust settle and hoping that a change of scenery will do it's trick to spark something.
What I've learned? You just have to do it. Whatever "it" is, you have to do something in order to keep things going. The start of this writing/entry... I had no idea or clear cut direction of where I would take it. I wasn't seeking to find "direction", but it's certainly given insight in my reflections on past events. What do I want to gain from this? What is "this"? What is it that I want to do?
Well those are all uncertain questions that have uncertain answers. I know that I do need to focus on my work/career again. I know I'd like to work on being more creative. I'd like to work on being "inspired". I'm always seeking to be fit. For awhile, I started to see some muscle definition and fat loss, but I'm letting that slip away if I continue to indulge in sh*t food and inactivity.
Let's say I know the answers to these questions... The problem or solution lies in the preparation, work, and willingness to do so... Lord have mercy (not that I'm a religious person or anything), let's get sh*t going again.
amen :)
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