When it's dry, it's a drought; When it rains, it pours. It's gray and raining outside. I'm inside nervous and hectic.
I wake up at 8:30 in the morning, the same time my sister is heading out for work. I hear the rain outside and the pitter patter it makes on the concrete. I enjoy the sound and I feel a certain calmness.
I make my cup of coffee to wake up a bit. I planned on calling the Health Insurance company to understand my elgibility of benefits. I'm dreading to hear what I already know, but I need to confirm it. I correspond with an automated operator for the first 10 minutes. I'm on hold for another 5 minutes. I get a hold of a representative and I asked her to explain my eligibility of benefits. She said she has to double check and puts me on hold for another 5 minutes. She gets back on the phone and explains the whole thing. I have this $xxxx deductible along with a $xxxx out-of-pocket expense that I would have to accumulate before being eligible for my professional mental health benefits. I had wishful thinking and hoping I was wrong, but my health benefits were confirmed. The rep also explains that my visit to the psychologist would be paid out of my own pocket and wouldn't go towards my out-of-pocket expense or deductible. Only medication, surgery, and hospital visits account for that. Another blow for me.
I'm left with a task this coming new year. If I continue to work from home as a freelancer, I might need to change health care plans. Do I pay low monthly premium with a high deductible or high monthly premium with a low deductible. Depends on how often I have doctor visits. I consider myself young and healthy, but I know shit can happen.
After my initial visit to therapy, I've been rationalizing my visit and future appointment(s). If I go every week or two for a shorter period of time, then it will be cheaper then a health plan where I pay higher monthly payments for a whole year. I also think, do I really need to seek therapy? I've already committed for at least another appointment, so the next question is. Will I benefit from it? I know there are crappy Psychologist out there, but the success of therapy is greatly influenced by how willing the patient opens up.
I don't know now. I'm stressed and frustrated about the financial aspect of it, but I really think I could benefit from the therapy. Decisions, decisions; too many people hate dealing with this and either dismiss everything and not doing anything about their health. Or people neglect their health plans and let bills pile up.
I know I have to be smart and responsible and that's what I'm trying to do. Mental health is just as important as physical health. Finances only disrupts, distracts, and diminishes it.